A guy is out with buddies and has a few drinks and is feeling horny but true to his wife, goes home. He finds her sound asleep in bed with her mouth wide open, so he gets two aspirin and drops them in her mouth.
She starts to choke, but recovers and asks, “What the hell did you put in my mouth?”
He says, “Two aspirin.”
She replies, “BUT I DON’T HAVE A HEADACHE!”
He says, “That’s all I wanted to hear.”